Tapping into Your Emotional Intelligence
It is my pleasure to be writing to you in this festive season of December – where we get some time to slow down, and come in contact with our ‘Being’ away from our busy ‘Doing‘ or should I say Slow Down Execution and Speed Up Reflection to gear up to a purpose driven 2017.
When I slowed down to reflect on what should be a key People and Leadership differentiator in 2017, my first ‘aha’ moment came with this – I took a strong resolve to reflect effectively and effortlessly – I realized that the Universe Conspired to show me a set of insights or rather a pattern of insights which all pointed towards one direction.
I am taking this opportunity to share the insights the universe chose to bring to my attention to validate my belief – Tapping into your Emotional Intelligence to impact the world around you:
- In our Flagship program Global Leadership and Coaching Seminar, there is one section on Archetypes- Tapping Your Heroes Within. When our leaders played different roles to tap into their various constructive emotions and also its contrary, we have seen some leaders breakdown with ‘ahas’ and some of them finding it difficult to connect with their emotions. Some said “Intellectually we get it, we know we have to consciously practice it”. At whatever level you are at, now may be the right time to channel some efforts in that direction.Yes, please take the courage to tap into the multitude of constructive emotions which each one of us have within – You can be a warrior if you choose to be, or you can be the magician, you can choose to be a positive victim , or you can be the example of a constructive destroyer. The Question is – Are You ready to tap into the richness within you?
- I was having lunch in Singapore with one of our business partners from Australia, Alison Lalieu of UBalancer. Our discussions centered a lot around challenges and opportunities we faced as companies that focused on Global Leadership Development.As we say, every conversation should add immense value to both the parties – Alison shared her journey from a humble UBalancer Coach à to a ICF Certified Professional Coach à To an EQ Enabler Coach (she was in Singapore for one part of her EQ Course certificationJ). Once again, The word EQ hit me from a different angle.No matter what you drive as a leader – agenda, strategies, deadlines, people; your Key Differentiator would be the Emotional Sense and Sensibility with which you drive each component. Do take the courage to develop your Emotional Intelligence…tap into it your ever ready reservoir to differentiate yourself.
- One of the reflective afternoons, I opened the November 2016 print copy of Harvard Business Review and the first thing I see are the words in page 54:“I’m gradually learning to be less rational and more emotional. We need to appeal to our employees emotions to help create an environment where they can innovate”Again an universal validation to what could be the driver and differentiator going ahead. Please take the courage to consciously observe the situations around you that merit an emotionally intelligent reaction. Please take a step by step effort to demonstrate yourself and observe others for Emotionally Intelligent behaviors.
- By now, I started to believe in the omens the universe threw at me. But what was challenging is to understand what should be the key components of an Emotionally Intelligent ecosystem – Well, can you believe that I got the answer from the Universe yesterday through a situation from a couple of days ago!I was moderating a small group discussion in one of the Women Empowerment Forums. We had a certain time limit set for the group discussion and then the group had to collectively debrief with the larger group.When it was time to wind down our discussion and take down key takeaways and action plan – The Forum Leader, came into our room to remind us of the time – I enthusiastically said “Give us a couple of more minutes….we are almost done”….which was received with an abrupt “Nope….Not like Last time”. My group members who were busy writing down some action plans, were quite taken aback and puzzled. This audience reaction softened the aggression and was followed by – “You know I am not aggressive….but Assertive” and the situation was salvaged. Only I knew the meaning of “not like last time”.
To cut another story short, we all have to face social situations where we may carry some unclarified feelings from the past, that leads to such show of emotions. The person who is the recipient (in this case Me), constantly keeps feeling – Why did I not have the courage to say anything in such a situation? The answer the Universe led me to is to the Father of Emotional Intelligence – Daniel Goleman, where he summarized it in one of the Harvard Business Review videos:
Well what more can I say or should I say – Leaders, make a wise choice of a good ratio and proportion of the five components, situationally and suitably. Take the Courage to tap into the ocean of constructive emotions that you have access to and also help others to meaningfully tap into their emotions.
(P.S – When I said a resolve to effectively and effortlessly reflect, I did not mean to mediate or sit in a quiet corner. I chose to keep my unconscious at its fullest awareness so that my Conscious can catch the signals from the Universe)
Illustrations by: Alberto Ruggieri